Musings On St. Augustine

Here’s a little bit from St. Augustine’s Expositions on the Psalms, reflecting on Psalm 40:4, which is,

How blessed is the man who has made the Lord his trust,
And has not turned to the proud, nor to those who lapse into falsehood.

Augustine writes in response,

Let our God be our hope. He who made all things, is better than all! He who made what is beautiful, is more beautiful than all that is such. He who made whatever is mighty, is Himself mightier. He who made whatever is great, is Himself greater. He will be unto you everything that you love. Learn in the creature to love the Creator; and in the work Him who made it. Let not that which has been made by Him detain your affections, so that you should lose Him by whom you yourself were made also.

Naturally, to a man who lives with a sexual attraction to men, this calls to mind the words of St. Paul in Romans 1:27, and I recognize that in my past relationships, I “exchanged God’s truth for a lie,” in essence worshiping and serving “the creature instead of the Creator, who is blessed for ever.”

The image below is one I took of the ceiling in the Constantine Room of the Vatican Museum. It shows the “Triumph of Christianity,” when Emperor Constantine ordered the idols destroyed throughout the Empire. It’s a beautiful juxtaposition of Christ’s power being revealed in his weakness: the bowed head of our Savior, hung on a Cross, is paradoxically the sign of greatest strength–which points to the reality that in my life, Christ’s power is revealed through my weakness. Always a good reminder.

It’s also a symbol for me of how the longing of my heart, which for so much of my life has been directed towards the creature, instead of the Creator, must be transformed through the power of the Cross so much so that I realize that my all and all is solely in God alone.

For a man who has come back to the Catholic Church because of the Church’s teaching on homosexuality, the shattered statue of a chiseled Greek male god is doubly significant.

IMG_0961.1

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